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A Girl Gang at Work

Well I don't know why all that UK lottery money has gone to put gilt edges on the National Opera House and keep a few failed luvvies in work. If you go out on the street you can get all the theatre you want, its real and its free.

A little while ago I went down to my local late night shop to get a bottle of wine to find a marvelous play being laid on by an amateur troupe. It was a play of six scenes:


Scene 1

A gang of girls go to a convenience store with the quaint notion that they did not have to pay. A shop worker, for some reason, disagreed with this idea and decided to prevent one of them from leaving with her bag full of goodies with her *GRAB!*


Scene 2

The first girl gives a robust response to the shopkeeper *SOCK!* *OUCH!* and the rest of the gang join in. Oh dear the one on the left seems to want to stop me photographing this scene *OI YOU!*. Perhaps she is having a bad hair day. Or maybe she has some concerns about theatrical copyright.


Scene 3

Both shop owner and young lady decide to have a tug of war. Perhaps this the latest keep fit craze.


Scene 4

The girl on the left is saying the first letter of a well known... Oh to hell with it she is saying 'fuck'. It is a word that seems, well, how shall I say, not a stranger to her lips.


Scene 5

Well there are no knives or guns so it is resolved by the final aria. The girl in blue is asserting that the shopowner is a "racist rapist". I thought that this wimsical alliteration shows that the billions poured into education in this country has not been wasted.


Scene 6

There is no scene 6. It melted into the night like the prospect of sex with a hot date when you reveal that you still live with your mother.

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